Wednesday, June 9

Home...

Yesterday was a hard day. I was discharged in the late afternoon. It was so difficult to leave our baby. Having been through this already with Little Man, I knew what was coming, but that still doesn't keep you immune from the heartbreak of leaving your child. Obviously, I cannot be in two places at one time and I have small children who need me both places. Little Man had a tough time with our separation while I was in the hospital. He has hardly left my lap since I came home. I am glad that we are still co-sleeping with him because I think that is helping.

I am impatiently waiting for my milk to come in. The NICU is upping the baby's feedings every day, and I haven't been able to keep up (which isn't unusual since it takes a couple of days, normally). It is frustrating because I had a ton of milk when Little Man was in the NICU, due to the fact that I had only weaned Sugar Plum a few months earlier. I'm giving the baby all I can, but the nurses are supplementing with formula (something I was hoping to avoid).

I know that I owe a lot of you e-mails. I am hoping to get to them today. I had Internet access at the hospital, which was wonderful! It was hard to write e-mails and posts though, because the connection was slow and spotty.

I'll update on our little one's progress later today! Thank you for your prayers!

12 comments:

elizabeth said...

hang in there! not easy to not have your children all together... Lord have mercy!

Michelle M. said...

I'll be praying that your milk comes in soon. I know how much pressure we can put on ourselves when we have a baby in the NICU because one of the only things we can do is provide milk. Try not to worry about it because you know it will come in and then that is all he will get from that point on. We'll continue to pray for you all. Is there anything that we can do to help from afar?

Lucy said...

It was only relatively recently I actually realised that mamas are discharged before their babies...it came as a shock. I am sorry you had to come home without your newest little armful of joy. Praying for you all - in some ways it reminds me of waiting to bring our children home during the adoption process, for us it took weeks and was very hard so I can partly imagine something of how you must feel. Many blessings.

Bethany Hudson said...

Emily,
You're in my prayers. It was very difficult for me when James was hospitalized after birth, although after the first day, I stayed at the hospital in his room. NICU is harder, I know. If he was there, I wouldn't have been able to stay. Ours barely had room for either parent to sit down, and Sophia couldn't come in there with us. And, I will pray for you with the milk supply. I had a lot of trouble getting my milk to come in with a breast pump when James was born. I will pray that you have an easier time and that your little one can come home soon.

God bless,
Bethany

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry about your difficult day. I can't imagine that it wouldn't be. I thought about and prayed for you often yesterday and will continue to do so today.

Don't worry about all those emails. These daily updates are so generous and much appreciated.

Oh, and I have a Moby Wrap I can send your way if you would like to borrow it and do some kangaroo care in the NICU.

Love to you all!

Matushka Anna said...

I'm so sorry you're going through the pain of leaving him in the NICU. All of mine came home with me so the only thing I can compare it to is when I handed my first son (older baby) over to the OR nurse for surgery. After the doors closed on them, I turned around to Father and said, I gave my baby to strangers. I'm going to throw up.

Keep pumping! That milk will come in and be more than sufficient.

Prayers

Pattie - Chicagoland, IL said...

Welcome home my friend. Soon your baby will join you and all will be right with the world. Thinking of you and yours on this beautiful summer day.

Courtney said...

You're doing just wonderfully, mama! Your Moby wrap will be so helpful for both of you, and you know that'll help with your milk too.

We're praying for all of you, and here for anything you need!

leah said...

I'm so sorry you are experiencing this pain. I can't imagine what you must be going through with little ones at home and one in NICU. Your milk supply will increase soon enough. You're doing great and all you can for your little ones. Prayers for all of you.

Alicia said...

Emily you and your family are in our prayers daily. The waiting to hold your baby in your arms in your own home is the hardest. This time will end and overall just be just a blip in your life together. Praying that you move on to the good part soon.

Alicia in New Zealand

Elizabeth said...

Emma,

I sat and thought about what I could say that would be of comfort and encouragement to you. I remember milk worries when I was a young mother with health issues. I understand the difficulty of leaving a small baby. I guess my prayer for you is that this period will pass quickly and well and that you will have your sweet child home in your arms at home soon.

I pray you can get lots of rest and can recuperate soon because I know that you have busy little ones who want their Mama.

God bless,
Elizabeth

Jen said...

I just got back online after a move to see your news. Praying for you and your family, and all of your concerns.

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